Many people believe that they’ll be safe going to bars into the wee hours of the morning. I’m having fun! After all, they’re not looking for trouble and things should be fine. Moreover, some people feel that they can go to demonstrations no matter what it’s about or who the participants are because it’s their right to go. That they’ll be protected by authorities because, after all, this is America.
The fact is that if you go to bars in the early morning hours you have a better chance of getting into a physical altercation or of being assaulted. Booze has been flowing for hours, machismo can be at its peak and inhibitions for malcontents and even sociopaths, have dropped lower than a frogs ass. If you play the odds for long enough, it’s just a matter of time that you’ll get into an altercation of some sort. If you’re good, you may be able to diffuse it or talk your way out of it but there’s the possibility that your inhibitions may be down too and maybe you might just say, hell with it, and boom, a fight starts. Or your diffusing skill simply may not work because of what the alcohol can do to your aggressor. Read the next paragraph and see the crux of the problem for good people:
Booze, Rats and You’re Diffusing Skills
According to an article entitled, ‘A farewell to Bar Fights’ written by Behavioral Neuroscientist Joshua Gowin PhD, “We’ve learned a great deal about alcohol’s effects on aggression by studying rats; they also become mean when drunk. In sober circumstances, rats often resolve disputes peacefully using body language a signal of submission so that an encounter does not become physical. When drunk, however, the aggressor will often ignore submissive cues and proceed to bite the prone rat. Liquored up humans may similarly be blind to social cues that signal an aggressor to calm down, such as conciliatory words or an attempt to diffuse the situation.” So, even if you might be good at talking your way out of trouble, booze may nullify your skills working on the boozed up aggressor.
How about going somewhere where there’s apt to be violence, like a demonstration? If either side has a record of violence, or the topic of the protest is extremely volatile, be prepared for volatility and be prepared for violence and that also means be prepared for a thumping. That thumping may come from the other side or even from the police if you happen to go with the flow of a crowd that ends up in a shit sandwich even if you’re just there for moral support.
The Shoulds Should go Away
A famous psychologist wrote many years ago about the neurotic ‘shoulds’. That many neurotic individuals live by a code of ‘The Shoulds’. I should not be judgmental. I should not be angry. And perhaps even, I should be able to go anywhere I want to, no matter what.
The fact is that there are steadfast possibilities that can and do occur when we go certain places at certain times. And the fact of the matter also is that it’s perfectly fine to not go to these places because of what may occur. We ‘should’ go when we’ve assessed the consequences for our well-being and when we’re fine with those possibilities. It’s okay to work toward our civic goals differently than going to all demonstrations, or at least the seemingly volatile ones, and it’s certainly fine to stay away from bars during the late hours.
Conversely, it’s alright to go to bars late at night and to volatile demonstrations. What! Ha, yes it is. But know the consequences that are likely to occur and don’t be surprised at the world’s ‘unfairness’ if things get ugly. The ‘world’ is not fair and that’s okay. It is what it is. The world is true. See the truth of your surroundings and act prudently in your favor.
Check out Steve’s latest book: http://tinyurl.com/zcbkkyy
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